Tuesday, January 11, 2011

It's that time of the year

Yep, it is indeed that time of the year for me. Birthday-time. On Thursday, this year. I was actually born on a Friday so I was the original inspiration for Jason in Friday the 13th. I'm scary like that.

I used to love my birthday. Being woken up at an ungodly hour by the sound of someone who's voice is like that of a whale mixed with a kid having nasal problems on a roller coaster, is allowed once a year. Consuming ridiculous amounts of cake without feeling that muffin-top looming is allowed once a year. Acting all surprised when your overweight aunt Mary tries to jump out from behind the bean bag, is allowed once a year and not hilarious at all.

Birthdays are a big deal in my family. Like so many other things.




The invitations: mostly verbal since my people have surpassed snail mail AND the Internet. They're that fast.

Lots of guests: you were only born once, Mom says, so you might as well take advantage of other people's kindness on that day by demanding presents since the one you got from them for Christmas, well, is now a matching set of 15. Thanks for (another) wine bottle stopper, uncle Shawn. We're just opening bottles of wine every time you come around since you insist on seeing each one of your stoppers. And watching you get ridiculously drunk at what stage you then take off your shirt and pretend you're part of the Village People while doing the Macarena. Fusion. Good times.

A sit-down meal: no finger snacks here, friends. My family firmly believe that we're not savages. And the fact that you now have your one hand free to hold your drink with sitting at the table and loading your plate with food at the same time is not an incentive at all.

The cake: you are not the baker of your own cake. Nor are you the chooser of your own cake. Never. That privilege goes to either Mother or Sister. They have a non-erotica policy. I once wanted a Playboy bunny cake, but instead ended up with something that looked like this:


And there will be no surprises this year.


This year it'll just be Chris and I. And the dogs. We'll be having the cake I chose, sipping some champagne while sitting on our veranda watching the sun go down and smile about not having to fish out cupcake wrappers from the toilet.

This year I'm turning such an insignificant age and it feels as though I'm stuck in the middle, in a liminal phase. I don't feel like spending money on being stuck. I'd save that for Chris's birthday since he's turning 30 this year. If and when I turn 30 and I'm still wrinkle-free I might consider letting the fam throw me a surprise party.

But until then:

25 comments:

Maryx said...

Happy (A little early?) Birthday to you Lovely Lady!! Hope you get spoiled rotten and showered with love! =)

Helle Kristine Tumbridge said...

I hope you have a fantastic birthday! They are very important to my family too, and we always congregate at my grandparent's house for a sit-down dinner, almost always a roast. B'day person gets to choose which meat. I am always the designated cake bringer, because I do good decorating.

Organic Meatbag said...

You better have a super dandy birthday, LT! I'm going to be 37 next month, so I'll tell you now, it gets harder (that's what she said!)after 30! Yikes!

Just Like You said...

Happy Birthday. I loved the picture of the little girl with the cake that says you're adopted. Thank you for visiting my blog. I left a response to your comment. Your point was very astute. I guess being from South Africa you know a lot about lions. The worst thing I have to worry about is a stray pitbull or a rabid fox. Take care, and thanks again. Just so you know my other persona is bothered. Enjoy both sites.

Sally-Sal said...

Ha! That last picture was great.

I have a birthday coming up later this month, too. You should take pictures, lots of pictures!

Christopher said...

Well happy birthday. Hope it's enjoyable watching the sunset.

ladytruth said...

Maryx: rather too early than too late, right?

HKT: next time I think I'll give you a call to be my cake-person!

Meatbag: they say when you hit 40 you're reborn again. So just hang on :)

Just Like You: thanks for coming around; next time I'll give you some tips on how to tame a lion and make them eat your hand ... eh sorry, OUT of your hand :)

Sally-Sal: I guess March-April was a busy month in the stork's department! As for taking pictures while I'm stuffing my face with cake ... we'll just have to wait and see ;)

Christopher: I think it'll be more enjoyable than watching a six and two year old destroy my flowerbeds, jump in my fountain and scare away the neighbourhood boys. Actually, that last one might have been pretty enjoyable! Thanks for stopping by :)

Sharon McPherson said...

Birthday Gal! Happy birthday! The plan for the day sounds great to me ... I hope it's your best birthday yet. :)

Dan said...

Ahhhh, missed it! Hope your day was filled with cake, wine, jelly, and quite possibly a breakdancing competition.

Happy belated birthday LT!!

XX

runawaybride said...

So today is your birthday.. I'm on time.. Happy Birthday! Muah Muah.. and Hugs...

runawaybride said...

Actually its 13th in India!

Gorilla Bananas said...

Rejoice that you are still young and fertile, Ladytruth! May you be so for many more birthdays!

Maryx said...

I'm back! Happy Birthday Lovely Lady!! Enjoy it!

Possum said...

According to all the time zones I have lived in today is the day!
...I'm thinking a Banjo, Kettle Drum, Ukelele and Penny Whistle quartet as backup for your official birthday chorus singers...yes?
Happy Birthday LadyT! Enjoy and celebrate every moment of it!
xxx

ladytruth said...

Sharon: now that I've experienced it ... it was alright :)

Dan: if by breakdancing it's implied breaking things while dancing, then yes! There was some breakdancing going on, alright!

Runawaybride: be it too early, be it a little late, the wish still stays the same and is still appreciated as well :)

GB: that will be a birthday wish I'll remember for a long time! ;)

Maryx: thanks for the double! :)

Penny: that is exotic even for my taste! Thank you very much :)

otherworldlyone said...

Happy birthday, lovely!

My family is the same way about birthdays: homemade cakes, big dinners, and much ado about, well, everything. And as far as I'm concerned, that's the way it ought to stay. For me at least. I'll never be one of those people that gets old and says, "Well, it's just another day. I'd rather not think about how old I am." Fuck that. :)

I'm still not over the excitement of having you back. YAY!

Mrs. Cullen said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U!!!!

Birthdays are NOT a big deal at all in my family. Interesting.

ladytruth said...

OWO: yeah, the birthday didn't go as planned (of course) and I wouldn't have had it any other way than the good old fashioned family way! And yay from me for you being still happy about my backness ... missed ya, sista :)

Mrs. Cullen: we can't all be the same right? Then we'd be writing about the same boring things and would have a bloody boring life. So I say viva differences! ;)

Nick said...

I like the "you're adopted" cake, although more of a shock if presented to an 28-year-old.

ladytruth said...

Nick: life is always full of surprizes I guess!

Shopgirl said...

Happy birthday. I have been reading your lovely comments on other blogs before finally finding your blog (thanks to "Simple Thoughts") today. Congratulations on getting to do the birthday your way.

Judearoo said...

Belated Birthday Greetings, Sweetie! x

Madame DeFarge said...

Belated birthday thingies to you. All birthdays are significant after 40. I'd like them to happen to someone else though.

Stumbling, Falling, Dreaming & Flying said...

i love those birthday cards, child style.

Lola Lakely said...

Happy Birthday, lovely lady. I'm glad to see that you're back. I've been a bit remiss on getting back to people's comments amoung other things but it's nice to know you around once again. Congrats on all of your good fortune- especially your marriage. You deserve it. And since I'm an excellent judge of people who deserve things, you can believe me.