Tuesday, January 4, 2011

What you can learn from relationships by growing plants and vegetables


I've never been good at gardening or growing anything. I tried growing a vegetable patch once. Instead of my vegetables turning out like this guy's, it looked a little more like this:


Needless to say, after eating one I ended up like this:



My plants died for no reason ... or so I thought. I'd water them everyday and after a week they'd just wither away. Only then my mother informs me to water them twice a week. So I buy a new plant. And water it twice a week. Meticulously. It died again. Only then my sister tells me that you have to water according to the plant and the plant's needs. Some are twice a week, some more. Some need a lot of direct sunlight, some love the shade.

Kind of like relationships.

I've had a few in my time. I've smothered them with water thinking that's what they wanted when in fact the turd was too lame to tell me that he liked little water and lots of shade. Good thing I killed THAT relationship after week 3.

And that was my main problem in relationships: the talking part. Just like plants some men would say nothing but just stare at the light thinking I was telepathic and knew that they were thinking McDonalds while I was thinking more along the lines of fine dining and dancing. But I have learned a few things along the line.

I have learned that saying to yourself this is what I want and this is what I like does not make it true, but only aggravates the feelings of self doubt and loneliness:
Brainwashing only gets you so far.


I have learned that trying too hard will not make it last any longer:

Plus it makes you feel bloated, frustrated and fat. Not sexy.

And I've learned that when you start pretending and belittling yourself to make him feel better about his little weener of a personality, it's usually time to bail. Even through the window if necessary.

Seriously, you don't have to pretend you never knew "Milan" wasn't Julius Caesar's last name anymore.

And that's how Chris and I made it. We ran through and jumped over all the obstacles relationships are riddled with, all while holding hands.  And when he went on one knee to ask my hand in marriage (I know, how cliché, but still fabulously romantic!) there was no way I'd give up that chance for happiness.

It'll be a year in April and the honeymoon phase is kinda over, but it's still good. It's better than good. It's great having someone to share your ice cream with while waiting for your order; it's wonderful walking around without any make-up on and not worrying he'll run after you trying to throw a sheet over your face from the horror of seeing your freckles and less than perfect complexion; it's pretty awesome laying in the bath and talking about his day and yours. It might be simple, but it's ... good.

If he'll hold your flowers while your busy with a pose, it's a good sign. Obedience: great start to any marriage :)

17 comments:

Maryx said...

Thank you... I really needed to read this today. I'm so happy for you sweetie, and I have to hope that I find the same happiness you have.

Take care

Sally-Sal said...

You look absolutely beautiful! I'm so happy for you guys.

And I laughed so hard when I read this: his little weener of a personality.

Helle Kristine Tumbridge said...

Funny, I have always been better with plants than menfolk. Love the wedding pic by the way. Gorgeous.

Possum said...

LOVE this post...
...on so many levels!

Fab flowers in that bouquet and even fabber frock!!!

otherworldlyone said...

Beautiful! This post and you. I love the new attitude, I love the realizations, and I love.that.dress. :)

ladytruth said...

Maryx: Of course you'll find it! When you start being good to yourself, good things will follow. Or so they say? :)

Sal: Yeah, I was actually being kind on that loser. Oh, the untold stories! But thank you :)

HKT: You must have that special touch, cause I still can't really find it :)

Possum: Thanks for the love! It's always good being on the receiving end of it!

OWO: A few things have changed and the new attitude comes with the new me, I guess. Still figuring out if that's a good thing. I loved that dress too ... sigh ... too bad good food has made it impossible to appreciate on the body lately. Thanks for the love, sista! :)

Eric said...

A very respectable looking couple there! Wait is he checking you out? Oh right, that's allowed.

Trick/Pony said...

I'm not letting anyone NEAR my ice cream....

ladytruth said...

Eric: When I first saw the photo, I thought the exact same thing, but then again the cleavage was a bit much :)

Trick/Pony: You will, someday ;)

Gorilla Bananas said...

Nice wedding picture. I think he fancies you, Ladytruth!

Madame DeFarge said...

Lovely photos -all of them, honest :). Good to see you back again. And maybe if I didn't buy frozen veg, my life would have been simpler.

JennyMac said...

SO happy for you and so happy to see you again!

ladytruth said...

GB: He better fancy me; I intend on spending my life with him! :)

Madame D: Nah, vegetables are overrated anyway :)

JennnyMac: thank you and happy to be seen again :)

Thiruppathy Raja said...

Thank you for posting such a useful, impressive and a wicked article./Wow.. looking good!

Growing Plants

juegos de ben 10 said...

You look absolutely beautiful!

mensajes claro said...

Thank you for posting such a useful, impressive and a wicked article.

canciones nuevas said...

You look absolutely beautiful!